What May You Use To Handle Ready-to-eat Food

So, you've got some delicious, ready-to-eat food. Awesome! But now comes the big question: What do you actually use to grab it? This, my friends, is where things get interesting. And maybe a little controversial.

The Obvious Answers (That Bore Me)

Let's get the boring stuff out of the way first. We all know about the "right" ways. Utensils, obviously. Forks, spoons, tongs – the whole shebang. Perfectly sanitary. Perfectly…predictable. Then there are gloves. Imagine yourself wearing a sterile lab coat and reaching for that slice of pizza. It works, but does it spark joy? I think not.

And don't even get me started on those tiny little cocktail forks. Sure, they're cute for olives and artichoke hearts. But try spearing a decent-sized chicken wing with one of those bad boys. You'll end up looking like you're battling a prehistoric beast with a toothpick. Not a good look.

My Unpopular Opinion (Brace Yourselves)

Okay, here it is. Deep breaths. I'm just going to say it: Sometimes… your hands are the best tools for the job.

I know, I know! Gasps of horror! Visions of germs dancing on your fingertips! But hear me out. We wash our hands, right? (Please say yes.) And honestly, sometimes you just need the tactile experience of picking something up with your own two digits.

Think about it. Are you really going to use tongs to delicately peel the skin off a perfectly roasted chicken? Are you going to meticulously cut every single strawberry into bite-sized pieces with a knife and fork? Probably not. You're going to use your fingers. And you're going to enjoy every second of it.

Of course, this isn't a free pass to lick your fingers after every bite (although, sometimes…). There are definitely times when utensils are essential. Soup, for example. You're not drinking soup from your hands. Unless you’re really trying to make a statement, which, hey, no judgment here. We've all had those days.

When Hands Are Heroes (and When They’re Not)

Let's break it down. When are hands totally acceptable? Here are a few situations where I give the thumbs-up (literally):

• Picking up finger foods (duh!). Chicken wings, fries, onion rings – they're practically begging to be held.
• Sampling something while cooking. A little taste test never hurt anyone. Just use a clean finger, okay?
• When you're the only one eating. Let's be real, if you're home alone scarfing down nachos, who's going to judge you for using your hands? Your dog? I think not.

Now, when should you absolutely, positively avoid using your bare hands? Pretty much anytime you're serving other people. Unless, of course, those other people are very, very close friends who are okay with your "unique" approach to food safety. But even then, maybe just grab a spoon. You’ll become the hero of the day.

The Ultimate Test: The Chips

Let's talk about chips. Potato chips. Tortilla chips. Any kind of chip, really. Are you going to carefully scoop up a single chip with a spoon? Of course not! You're going to dive right in with your hand, grab a fistful, and shove them in your mouth. It's the only way to truly experience the joy of chips. It is an art.

And what about dipping? Sure, you could use a spoon to dollop some salsa onto your chip. But where's the fun in that? You want to get a good, generous scoop. And sometimes, that requires a little finger action. Just double-dip at your own risk. The consequences of that choice are on you.

The Bottom Line

Look, I'm not advocating for a complete abandonment of all food safety protocols. But I am saying that sometimes, we need to relax a little and embrace the simple pleasure of eating with our hands. Just wash them first, okay? And maybe don't do it at a fancy restaurant. Unless you're feeling particularly rebellious. In which case, go for it! Just tell them I sent you.